Bunkodemic
Everything is trending downward but greed and gullibility.
Had a lovely note via email signed by Jacob Leibenluft, who works for the Office of Recovery Programs at the Treasury Department. The memo, addressed to Dear Beneficiary, explains that I “have been selected alongside a few other beneficiaries to receive a payment of $1,250,000 (One Million Two Hundred and Fifty Thousand Dollars) only.”
As my correspondent admits, it’s “only” $1.25 million, but I must say, as a semi-retiree on a fixed income, every little bit helps. All that my benefactor needs me to do, as is thoughtfully explained, is to furnish him with my “personal details as requested below to facilitate the processing of your payment.” Namely:
(1) Full Names:
(2) Residential Address:
(3) Date of Birth:
(4) Phone/Cell Number:
(5) Occupation:
Evidently it’s not really up to me. It’s a legal obligation. “We demand your utmost cooperation to enable us expedite this payment. It is guaranteed that this process would be executed under a legitimate arrangement that would legally protect you from any breach of Law.”
Well, the last entity I want to be on the wrong side of is the Department of Treasury. But I must say there are a couple of oddities in this demand letter. The first is that the return email is jacobleibenluft1@gmail.com, which is not a federal government address. The second is that the return phone number is not in the 202 area code for Washington, but (217) 377-5710, which is in the neighborhood of Peoria, Ill. Response by text only is a further stipulation.
I know you’ll think I’m paranoid, but I did wonder if this Mr. Leibenluft is 100% legit. I know that’s the name of the Treasury guy who runs such a recovery program here in Washington. And, yes, the letter “guaranteed “ my legal protection. The sender also explained that the law benefits “scam victims from previous years,” which would be an odd promise from a scammer himself. Still, I confess to some nagging doubts. So when I sent my details, I did not disclose my phone number, DOB or occupation, substituting instead my Social Security number and bank account details. Oh, and this: “Gemini, on the cusp of Cancer!” You can never be too careful.
Now, you might wonder what would make me so suspicious. The answer is that we seem to be in the midst of a sudden epidemic of grifting of the most heinous kinds. A Bunkodemic, you might say.
Just last week, in Orlando, Fla., a guy named Jerald Clawson was charged with organizing a $5.3 million Ponzi scheme that defrauded at least 10 people, according to state Attorney General James Uthmeier. According to Uthmeier, Clawson sold his victims interest in so-called “bridge loans” for other people’s real estate transactions, with the promise of 100-300% profit in a few weeks. Yes, some grifters are brazen enough to sell you a Brooklyn Bridge loan. The bogus company was called Azure Waterfront LLC, as in “azure as I’m writing this, some people are as dumb as a sack of dog biscuits.” Also, blinded by greed. Because what griftees tend to have in common is the willingness to put on rational/ethical blinders when presented a shot at some easy money.
Speaking of greedy and stupid, there was also the outbreak of Fake News. Not fake news contrived to spread lies about the president. Rather the kind that media organizations publish because supposed freelancers sell the stories to them for peanuts, which is only slightly less than they pay journalists who actually exist.
Business Insider apparently bought and printed 34 articles supposedly written by Margaux Blanchard, but probably not because there is no such person. Rather, somewhere there is a fraudster who understands the media-business’s race to the bottom and foisted off AI-generated essays that presented supposed personal details that contradicted one another. BI was not alone in its obtuseness. The Daily Beast and Wired joined them in platforming such journo legends as “Tim Stevensen,” “Nate Giovanni,” “Nathan Giovanni,” “Amarilis J. Yera,” “Onyeka Nwelue,” “Alice Amayu,” “Mia Brown,” “Tracy Miller,” “Margaret Awano,” “Erica Mayor,” “Kalmar Theodore,” “Lauren Bennett,” “Louisa Eunice” and “Alyssa Scott.”
Never mind the space squandered on phony features instead of actual journalistic scrutiny of the powers that be, these watchdogs were too busy protecting the bottom line to investigate the provenance of their own articles. How are they any different from the suckers who fall for the “found wallet” con? (Rhetorical question)
Of course not all victims are motivated by avarice. Sometimes it’s the opposite: Good Samaritans exploited not for their greed and gullibility, but for their compassion and gullibility. I think we shall never see a greater example than an unnamed senior citizen in Sapporo, Japan. Late last month, police announced that she had been swindled out of 1 million yen by a social-media acquaintance she’d been communicating with for two months, mainly about his ongoing space travels. Then, a few weeks ago, he messaged her a mayday message in broken Japanese:
“Currently I’m coming to space on my spaceship, but I’m under attack and running low on oxygen.”
Then he asked her to send him digital currency so he could — I dunno — stop at a 7 Eleven to get an O2 fill-up. So she did. Five times. Unfortunately, to her great surprise and disappointment, when she told her family of her generosity, they flipped their lids and called the cops — which true-crime drama spoiled the whole romantic fantasy she had evidently embroidered during their online relationship. Police are now looking for the perp somewhere in the solar system.
Truth be told, however, she is by no means the most perversely deluded victim of the current Bunkodemic. Not even close. That honor is bestowed on MAGA, whose cult leader is a convicted fraud and who has been bleeding them dry with the same kind of lies he uses to make political points. Yet the cult of Trump — like a TV audience full of poverty- and mortality-fearing widows who keep writing checks to the repulsive “prosperity gospel” conmen Joel Osteen, Kenneth Copeland, Benny Hinn et al. — continue to put faith in their Prophet of Hate. They’ve bought Trump Bibles, gold-painted sneakers, $Trump crypto coins, nonexistent $499 Trump phones, $99 digital trading cards, Trump Social common stock and Trump cologne, not to mention the utterly misrepresented Big Beautiful Bill and the now grotesquely misnamed Justice Department.
Compared to the latest stunt, their credulousness practically qualifies as due diligence.
Because now Trump’s political action committee is highlighting Trump’s recent bizarro public ejaculation — “I want to try and get to Heaven” — and asking the Sea of Haters and Morons, like the old Japanese lady, to finance the impossible voyage. Pretty sure there is no corner of heaven set aside for crooked, bully perverts who live by the baldfaced lie, make policy a commodity to buy and leave countless vulnerable innocents to die.
Nonetheless, when the Never Surrender PAC sent out its latest fundraising email, the subject line was “I want to try to get to heaven.”
“God saved me for one reason,” said the most godless creep ever to redecorate the Oval Office as a 19th century bordello.
“TO MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! … This is our moment to show the world that we will NEVER back down, NEVER give an inch, and NEVER SURRENDER in our fight to save this country. That’s why I’ve launched a 24 HOUR TRUMP FUNDRAISING BLITZ, and I’m asking everyone to chip in $15 to make it one for the record books!”
Could happen, for as we know there are 100 million believers in the megachurch called MAGA — and also because, as we’ve learned from his pronouncements on polling results, weather reports and crowd estimates, the man keeps two sets of record books. I must say, though, I’m tempted. I’d love to see in which direction he heads when he has left this mortal coil. Because, up or down, he can’t do either and also grift his way into a third term.